JIPI AND THE PARANOID CHIP PDF

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He gropes across the dark table top for the joystick and zooms in on the face of a white woman sitting in the lobby, sipping tea and reading a magazine. One reason watching films is fun is that you can gape at beautiful people without being, or even feeling like, a creep.

But film actors always look perfect. Even when a nearby detonation blows a ton of muck all over them, you know the dirt will end up in neat, bone-structure-enhancing diagonal streaks under the cheekbones.

In a certain sense this gets boring after a while. You never get to stare at real people, with all of their mistakes and imperfections, in the same way you can stare at film stars. But then, either there is a minor temblor or else one of those Amsssop caterpillars across the street strikes bedrock, and the vibration turns the image into an elliptical blur that almost makes Jipi a little queasy. Cardoza gropes for the joystick and zooms way back.

Then he reconsiders. Some of our Guest Comfort Facilitators concentrate entirely on the nostrils. Not a Mindshare Manager. The whole concept of the latter term actually falling on a guests s ears is so mortifying to Mr.

Cardoza that the only response he can muster is nervous laughter. Then he changes the subject. Winds are vectored from an Amsssop site. Jipi pokes at some controls and brings up a floor plan of the lobby. But some of the dots near the door have begun to turn green. But then it begins to die down. The neutralizers must have kicked in. Just opened up yesterday. The Smell of Death situation has gotten totally out of hand while she was distracted by flashy but essentially unimportant developments on the Rotten Egg Smell front.

The tacticals only give you hints as to where you should focus your attention. Her chest rises and her nostrils flare slightly. Cardoza says, grabbing the joystick and zooming violently backwards. Then she does a prim, girlish deep knee bend and begins groping at the carpet.

Cardoza says. But it seems to have worked in this case. Cardoza rewinds the video a few seconds and then plays it back. They watch the white woman in closeup as she inhales the first traces of the Smell of Death into her nostrils. The faintest shadow of a new expression passes over her face. Cardoza says triumphantly. But before her mind consciously realized what she was smelling, Emily derailed her train of thought.

First-rate work. Jipi knows the score here. Cardoza is the general manager of Mindshare Management Associates Inc. But Mr. Cardoza asks, more amused than threatened. Probably not much makes him feel threatened. Cardoza says airily. Nowadays, the only people who stay at the Xanadu are high-tech businessmen from California, who like to think of themselves as exceptionally rational.

It is a great hotel for Vulcans. Everyone else avoids the Xanadu as if it were a leper colony. Cardoza admits. But we are in the reputation business here. Unless a guest can consciously articulate her feelings about a hotel, those feelings are not liable to be registered on the Net.

At least, the ones that have been smart enough to hire us. With Intramuros, the project finally reaches completion. I guess there are plenty of other opportunities for mindshare management professionals. Homer says that Nippon cranks out a hell of a lot of girls with nice personalities. Then why did Mr. Goto hire you? Why did he recommend you to us?

Goto has the hots for her, but decides not to mention this. It would only lead to the question of why Homer prefers her to all of those perky Nipponese girls. Before it got really valuable, Intramuros was largely bought by the Asian Economic Miracle Management Foundation, a shadowy pan-Asian nonprofit, headquartered out of Tokyo and Hong Kong, whose goal is to help Asian countries that are on the cusp of having their very own economic miracles manage the process in some small way and avoid the mistakes that permanently marred the landscapes of the first economic miracle states.

So now the district is mostly a great big historical park with ancient churches poking out of the lawns from place to place. Mindshare Management has its offices in one of those skyscrapers. Teeb frequently flies in from Yap, and then she and Jipi hang out together. Jipi does pretty well at the Manila Hotel job. One morning, most abruptly, she gets promoted to what Mr. Cardoza says, not without a certain ominous vibe, is a much more demanding position.

The others are reproduced, except with small random differences, and then they repeat the cycle for, like, millions of times. The answer, clearly, is that a Mr. To say as much would be to embarrass himself and to embarrass Jipi respectively. Cardoza has not risen to the top of the mindshare management consulting industry by embarrassing himself or others. Normal criminals behave more or less predictably. Paranoid schizophrenics, on the other hand, are wild cars.

Is that where that expression comes from? Anyway, they are always doing things that are completely nuts. Cops worry about this. Jipi comes as close as she ever does to frowning. Jipi continues to wear the expression that in her case passes for a frown.

Every muscle fiber in Mr. He adopts an expression that Jipi read about in the encyclopedia once, in Mexico, after a neighborhood kid had stepped on a rusty nail; it is a common symptom among people suffering from end-stage tetanus infections and it is called rigor sardonicus. Cardoza says, sounding a bit fluttery. Time is a factor here. This enabled them to have conversations with individuals who were not physically present.

They also got some test subjects who were, I take it, just normal people, and set them up in cubicles somewhere with Net interfaces of their own. Cardoza gets up and attempts to draw a triangle on a whiteboard. Some people think visually! Try to illustrate key points with simple diagrams. So a vaguely triangular apparition ends up on the whiteboard.

Mentally healthy interviewers in cubicles somewhere else. And these software thingies on the Net. Cardoza, seemingly relieved that Jipi was not completely hurled off the track by his diagram. He tries to draw a circle in the middle of the triangle and ends up with sort of a mashed ovoid with a Pac-Man-like indentation in one side.

Sometimes a paranoid schizophrenic talking to a piece of software. It was like a game. Cardoza mumbles, kind of distracted by ongoing prosecution of the question mark balancing thing. Then it would be allowed to reproduce. If it gave the wrong answer, it would be terminated. Over time, the software evolved so that it got very good at identifying paranoid schizophrenics.

But you said that, at the end of the conversation, each participant was asked to give its opinion. Cardoza, hoist by his own graphical petard, becomes unnerved. Cardoza is one of these.

Cardoza basically never wears the same cologne twice, which helps to explain it. He never wears too much of it, and he always picks it so that it will complement, in some sense, what he is doing on this particular day. Today, he smells faintly like a rich, tasteful Middle Eastern gentleman, and Jipi wonders what is in store. But today he does not bulge his cheeks out in defeat.

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The story deals with the concepts of mindshare and evolutionary software. Jipi, a former Pacific-rim airline flight attendant , is staying with her friend in a high-rise luxury apartment building inside Manila 's walled district of Intramuros. The fiftieth floor of a neighboring high-rise, houses the Asian-Pacific headquarters of Mindshare Management, under regional supervisor, Mr. Goto Engineering is conducting a citywide sewer replacement project which produces unpleasant gases that have hurt the city's hospitality industry. Jipi, looking for work, is given employment by Mr.

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Jipi and the Paranoid Chip

He gropes across the dark table top for the joystick and zooms in on the face of a white woman sitting in the lobby, sipping tea and reading a magazine. One reason watching films is fun is that you can gape at beautiful people without being, or even feeling like, a creep. But film actors always look perfect. Even when a nearby detonation blows a ton of muck all over them, you know the dirt will end up in neat, bone-structure-enhancing diagonal streaks under the cheekbones.

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